The New Adventures of Amber!
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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Things Fall Apart, Part 1
So I tried to sleep, expecting that when the dreams came I'd find her there. But for the second night in a row, no Amber.
And the next day, as I ran errands and tried to busy myself with home improvement projects, the dark thoughts kept invading my consciousness. I went to bed early, hoping I'd meet up with my girl.
Nothing.
By the third day, I was a wreck. Rachel came over to talk about the leads she was following and to get my opinion on a few business items. Little did I know we were about to have a giant donnybrook at the house.
"So anyway, we're running down the limousine and trying to see where it connects. But we're not out of options, so I don't want you to lose heart. This isn't over."
"I appreciate it, Rachel, I really do."
"I know this is hurting you. If I can help, just say so."
"Thanks. But nothing solves this nightmare other than resolving it. You're doing all you can on that score, so, really..."
"Oh, isn't THIS friendly?"
"What are you doing here, Katie?"
"I came to check on you, because you aren't answering your phone, and now I see why."
I looked at my phone.
"I don't have any missed calls from you."
"Well, that's strange. So is this romantic little scene you have going here."
"Honestly, Katie, I think you have the wrong idea. Oscar and I are friends, and as it happens colleagues, and we're working on getting your sister home."
"Oh, sure. I can see that!"
"Katie, shut up. Really. Nothing untoward is happening here. We're talking about Amber and trying to get her home. Period."
"Why even lie to me like that?"
"It isn't a lie," said Rachel. "We haven't done anything wrong. It's actually really obnoxious of you to accuse us."
"Well, my friend Sheila saw y'all at the movies yesterday. Were you talking about Amber then?"
"This is bullshit. Katie, go away. I'm not talking to you when you're like this."
"Oh, so now it's 'go away, Katie.' Got it. Just wrote my sister off and moved on."
"What did you just say to me?"
"Well, where is she, Oscar? This woman is supposed to be a pro, so why isn't she home yet?"
"Oh my God, I can't believe this," said Rachel.
"She's just angry," I said.
"Don't patronize me. Where is Amber?"
"Probably in the hands of a Mexican cartel lord right now," I said. "We nearly missed rescuing her in a warehouse in Tampico where they were training her as a prostitute."
Katie was struck dumb. She looked at Rachel, who nodded her head.
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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Things Fall Apart, Part 2
"No contact since the police raided that warehouse," I said.
"Oh my God."
"We're trying to figure out our next move," I told her.
"OK, I think I'm going to head out," said Rachel. "I have that thing, and then that other thing."
"Got it. I'll see you later."
Katie gave Rachel an evil eye as she moved past.
But then...
"Oh, no. Where are you going?" That was Kim.
"I have to leave, Kim. I have things to do."
"What are you doing here, Kim?"
"What I'm doing here is I heard about the hot new romance you two are carrying on, and I thought maybe I ought to talk some sense into one or both of you."
"This is why I don't have any female friends," said Rachel.
"That's not the only reason," said Katie.
"OK, stop," I said. "This is stupid. Am I allowed to offer some facts here?"
"We know the facts," said Katie.
"I just want to say that really, you shouldn't be dating anyone right now," said Kim.
"And I'm not," I said.
"But you went on a date yesterday, with her," Kim said.
"Kim, was it as long as a week ago when you showed up in a very pretty dress with your hair all glammed up and you made dinner for us? That seemed an awful lot like a date."
"Wait, said Rachel. "You went on a date, with her?"
"I never left the house."
"What's that supposed to mean, with her?" demanded Kim.
"I guess what it means is Oscar sure gets around," said Katie.
"Says the chick who openly crushed on me when you were living here three months ago. Don't start, Katie."
"Now I'm definitely leaving," said Rachel, giving me a pissed-off look.
"I'll call you later," I said, which earned me an even more pissed-off look.
Then she left.
"Hmmmph," said Katie.
"Whatever," Kim mumbled.
"What in the hell is wrong with you two?" I said.
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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Things Fall Apart, Part 3
"Get the..." I started to say.
"Be honest," said Kim. "You've slept with that girl, haven't you?"
"Exactly," said Katie. "Tell the truth."
"None of your damn business."
"That's what I thought," Katie said. "They're screwing like rabbits."
"No we aren't."
"But you did sleep with her."
"Under the literal definition, yes. We slept together. We did not, however, have sex. I kissed her on the cheek. That's as far as it's gone."
"I just don't believe you," said Kim.
"But I don't care if you believe me. I'm telling you what's happened."
"What's clear is that you need someone to take control," Katie said. "You're out of control."
"What? No. Hell, no. Especially not the way you think of control, Katie. Forget that."
"It doesn't have to be me. But you need a chaperone, because you're going to do what men do and then my sister might as well stay with the drug lord."
"Oh, right. And you've done what, exactly, to help bring her home?"
"I'm her sister! How could you ask me that?"
"Very easily. I've spent several thousand dollars already working on getting her out of there. You've done nothing but bitch and complain, and part of the reason we have this problem was because Amber felt neglected by you and went looking to Paula for a girlfriend to replace what she wasn't getting from her sister."
"Oh, that's such bullshit."
"No it's not, Katie," said Kim. "He's absolutely right about that."
"Yeah, well, you're supposed to be her friend. How come she went to Paula instead of you?"
"Katie," I said, "that's anything but productive."
"Yeah, whatever. Take her side. You're good at that. Siding with everybody but the family."
And then she left.
I looked at Kim.
"It's because I'm ugly," she said. "It's all because I'm ugly."
And that's when I knew that none of this was going to work without Amber home.
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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Back To Black, Part 1
And the other parts of her I loved so much.
It was setting in that I really might have lost her. That perhaps she was dead. That the men holding her would do things to her which couldn't be repaired.
And that the fiasco over the day before, which led to all three of the other women in my life being furious at me for various reasons, might have closed off some opportunities for recovery if the worst had, in fact, happened.
I thought about the possibility of just selling my place and taking off. To travel. Maybe getting a boat and becoming one of those aimless drifters with means plying their way along the Gulf Coast down to Key West and beyond.
Maybe. I didn't know what I wanted to do, and as crazy as the statement was coming from Katie, maybe she wasn't altogether wrong in calling me out of control. I was losing my rudder; that much was true.
Still, I had a life to lead, and dreams or no dreams I wasn't giving up on Amber. So I texted Rachel, who hadn't answered my calls or messages the night before.
"I'm sorry," I said. "Can we get together today?"
"Lunch?" she texted back. "The Mexican place?"
So that's where we met.
"How are you holding up? Any good dreams last night?"
"Unfortunately, no. I see your brief moment of sartorial color has passed."
"I don't know. Black, or at least black-ish, just seems like an appropriate color today."
"Why so?"
"I'm not sure. A bunch of reasons, I guess."
"That sounds a bit dire."
"Well, last night, I did a lot of thinking. And what I concluded was that I'm getting way ahead of myself."
"You mean with me."
"Yeah. It's wrong for us to carry on this affair, as innocent as it's been so far, any further."
"That makes me sad."
"I know, Oscar, and I'm sorry. But it's a conflict of interest because you're my business partner. It's a conflict because I'm supposed to be helping you find your girl and bring her home, and I have not succeeded. And I'm cheapening myself because I'm serving as a stand-in girlfriend when you're in no position to move on from Amber."
"I see."
"But look - this is not at all a reflection on how I feel about you. OK? I consider you a friend. Actually, you're my best friend. And under different circumstances, I would grab you and never let you go."
"Rachel, you aren't saying all this because of that shitshow at the house yesterday, are you?"
"Maybe somewhat, but the conclusions aren't wrong. There's a reason why one of the six sixes is six months out of a relationship. You are not ready to be anybody else's boyfriend."
"I can't argue with that."
"And the reason I got so mad and left wasn't because of what Katie or Kim said. I don't care about their opinions of me. What I was so angry about was you."
"Jesus, Rachel!"
"Hear me out. You let these two women, neither one of whom were there for either you or Amber when you needed them, come into your own house and push you around. Both of them walked right through the door without even knocking and started lecturing you."
"Well, to be fair, they're both close friends, and Katie is basically family..."
"Look, I understand all that. But I couldn't take it. And if I didn't leave, I would have said some things I couldn't take back. And it occurred to me a little later that what I was imposing on you was an impossible srandard."
"I don't think I totally understand."
"Oscar, I was thinking of you as my boyfriend, and I was angry that you weren't defending me from both of those two bitches essentially calling me a slut."
"I did pick up on that."
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Back To Black, Part 2
"Yes, you do. I mean, we're in business together."
"Which is separate, and rightly so, from any romantic thing. So, like I said, I'm way ahead of myself, and I need to correct that."
"OK. I get it. You make good points."
"But I want to say one thlng, and you will think I'm a bitch for saying it. I'm saying it anyway, because I'm right. Your little friend Kim? She's poison."
"Wow."
"No, she is. All that shit about you shouldn't be dating? It's because she LOST. She put her best moves on you and you didn't choose her. She completely failed to look out for Amber when you specifically asked her to, and then she tried to have you for herself as soon as Amber was gone."
"Yikes."
"So yeah, that's Bitchy Rachel giving you an honest appraisal. Yes, it's self-serving, but it's true. And I'm only telling you this BECAUSE I'm pulling back, so you'll know that I'm not trying to sabotage her for my benefit."
"I accept that. I don't know if I agree with it, but it's worth considering."
"You can do A LOT better than her, and not just because she's ugly."
"Oh, man. You don't pull any punches."
"I'm your friend above everything else, and as your friend, I owe you the truth. OK?"
"OK."
"So now I have more truth I don't think you're going to like. I talked to Pablo this morning. He's traced the limo in Tampico, and he ran some traps, and he gave me his assessment of what were looking at."
"Let's have it."
"The man who took Amber away is named Juan Pedro Lopez Andujar. They call him El Tiburon."
"Isn't that the big boss of CDN? I was reading up on him last night."
"That's the guy. And the limo is owned by a company in San Pedro Garza Garcia, which is a suburb of Monterrey. So Pablo says it's likely that..."
"Amber belongs to El Tiburon now."
"I'm really sorry, Oscar. I don't know what to say. There are going to be dozens of guys with guns around his compound. Now, maybe he would keep her someplace else, but..."
"No. She's with him. He would absolutely keep her close."
"A rescue is suicide, Oscar. I don't know what to say. I think we had our shot and we blew it. I failed, and I'm sorry."
"No, Rachel, you did great. Five girls are home with their families right now because of the work you've done. You're a hero. But yeah. You've done all you can and I'm eternally grateful."
She gave me a strange look when I told her that.
"Oscar, no. You can't..."
"This is my show now, Rachel," I said. "Have Pablo send me the location of this guy's compound."
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- Alottahope
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Re: The New Adventures of Amber!
Its like your foot is under the table going in for some fun...
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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Re: The New Adventures of Amber!
No comment.Alottahope wrote: ↑Fri Mar 22, 2024 5:45 am I love this one...Weather Amber agrees or not...
Its like your foot is under the table going in for some fun...
And by the way, this whole "I'm putting a stop to our little thing we're doing?"
Pretty confident I can sweep that aside if I want. She doesn't mean it!
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The Demand, Part 1
So I called Stella.
"I'm coming over," I said when she answered the phone. "And I want to make sure Dan is there because I need to talk to him."
"He's here," she said, "and I'll make sure he sees you. But pull around and use the side porch entrance so Paula can let you in."
I didn't know what that meant, but I said OK.
And a little while later, I was at the side porch door. Paula was waiting for me.
"Hi, Mr. Oscar. I'm sorry you had to use the side door. I'm not allowed in the front part of the house..."
"It's fine, Paula. Where is Cole?"
"He's upstairs in his study. I'll take you to him."
"I know where it is. What's with this getup of yours?"
"It's what I wear when I'm on restriction."
"On restriction?"
"The Pater decides whether you're showing a full commitment to The Process, and when he thinks you aren't, you go on restriction."
"Who is the Pater?"
"Mr. Cole."
"I see. And what did you do to earn your punishment?"
"I'm not allowed to discuss it with anyone other than the Pater unless he gives his permission."
"That's really interesting, Paula."
"He's very wonderful to me, you know. And The Process is..."
"Hey Paula?"
"Yes, Mr. Oscar?"
"Not to be rude, but I don't want to hear it from you."
"Yes, sir."
So she took me up to the study, and that's where I found Cole and Stella in a pair of easy chairs looking almost like a married couple.
"Ahh, there he is," said Cole.
"HI Stella," I said. "No, guys, don't get up. I hope to make this quick, because I'm really just here for one thing."
"What's the latest on Amber?" asked Stella. "Dan and I are very worried about her."
"Well, that's what I'm here about. Dan, let me start by saying it was my initial assumption that you were behind Amber's kidnapping. I now believe that assumption to be wrong, and as such I think I owe you an apology."
"Accepted. And I apologize for giving the wrong impression about Amber and The Process. Poor communication on my part there."
"That's quite all right."
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- Oscar DeBarataria
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The Demand, Part 2
She did.
"Now, I will say that while I appreciate that you don't believe I was behind Amber's kidnapping, I think we both at least suspect the source of that came from inside my household."
"I think that's correct, Dan."
"And this is why Paula here is on restriction. The Process requires me to reserve judgement until I know the truth. Paula hasn't told me the truth yet. Have you, Paula?"
"I told you what happened, Pater!"
"No, I think what you told me was a lie. And you're going to be on restriction until that's no longer the case. No food, only water from your bowl, only some access to the house, and you only get your restriction clothes to wear. Plus your lessons. Isn't that right, Paula?"
"Yes, Pater."
"I'll get the truth from her eventually, and when I do I'll decide what the remedy is. And Oscar, I apologize that The Process moves so slowly, but you see, it's equally important that bad behavior is cured at the root as it is that there are consequences for it."
"Dan, how you run your household is your business. I don't need a role in that, and I definitely am not interested in The Process, whatever it is. I'm really just here for one thing."
"What's that, Oscar?"
"I need you to make a call."
"That's something I think I can do. Who to?"
"Juan Pedro Lopez Andujar."
"El Tiburon? Of the Cartel Del Noreste? Why would you think I can call him?"
"Because you went to college with him, for one thing. You both graduated in economics from the University of Colorado in 1987. And for another, I know you've had dealings with him ever since."
"Oscar, I told you - Dan's connection to CDN comes from some construction workers who..."
"Stella, you might believe that, but I know that it isn't true. And so does Dan here."
"Well, I would characterize it as..."
"Dan, I don't care. What you do with those people is none of my business, and I don't want to make it my business. I'm here to get you to make that call. Period."
"Dan, you said..."
"Stella, I think you should take Paula down for her lessons in the Brick Room. Go now, honey."
Stella got up, took Paula by the wrist, and dragged her away.
"Now we can talk honestly. I would have preferred to have had this conversation without my women present, of course."
"Well, Dan, I can appreciate that you lost a little face with that exchange. Let's say we're even given that I found my girl naked and blindfolded in your Brick Room."
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The Demand, Part 3
"Set a meeting for me. I'm going down there to see him."
"You've lost your mind."
"No, I haven't."
"That's the kind of meeting you don't come out of alive."
"I disagree with you. And the fact is, he has Amber with him at his place in Monterrey, so I'm going to go over there and give him a chance to let me take her home."
"That's suicide. And it would look very bad for me to set it up, you know. I don't think I want to make that call."
"Do I need to spell out the leverage I can apply here, Dan?"
'"Are you threatening me?"
"I'm talking to you. It seems like I'm negotiating with you. I don't think it's a long conversation we need to have before you realize making this call is in your interest."
I could see the gears grinding in his head, and it was clear Dan knew that I could make his life very uncomfortable if I really wanted to based on the information Rachel and her people had uncovered on him.
I just sat back in my chair and looked at him.
"Fine. I'll make the call. It's your funeral."
"Oh, I don't think so. I'm a lot more optimistic than you are."
Dan put his phone on speaker, set it in his lap and tapped a number already in his contacts.
"Si!" said a voice on the other end of the line.
"Tibby! It's Dan Cole."
"Hola, Danny! How is things where you are. Are you in Miami?"
"No, not until next week. I'm still in Louisiana. Listen, I have a friend of mine here, his name is Oscar de Barataria, and he'd like to come and see you about a...personal matter."
"Oh? What matter?"
Dan looked at me.
"It's about a girl sir," I said. "A very beautiful, very loved Factory Girl."
"Interesting," said the voice on the other end of the line.
"Oscar is a stand-up individual," said Cole. "I can vouch for his character and judgement."
And then he gave me an intense look.
"Ehhhh," said El Tiburon, "next Tuesday, four p.m. Come to the Hacienda."
"Thank you, Senor Andujar," said Cole.
"I look forward to meeting you, sir," I said.
The line went dead.
"Well," said Cole, "it was nice knowing you."
"You did as I asked," I said. "Let me know when Paula finally confesses."
"Things will get interesting when she does," he said.
I shook his hand and made my way home.
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Re: The New Adventures of Amber!
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The Sendoff, Part 1
I wrote out a will and emailed it to my lawyer, together with a letter to my folks explaining the entire saga that, in the event the letter would be needed, led to my demise.
And I arranged for Rufus to stay with the Hunleys, an elderly couple three doors down who'd been his dogsitters for years, "for a few days and maybe longer."
Plus a few other things.
I was confident my mission would be a success. But practicing a little contingency planning definitely had me in a morose mood. And it was frustrating, because I should have been excited at the prospect of getting Amber back.
What I decided was to head to the Wanderer, a dive bar in the neighborhood where I've wasted many a night, and give myself a send-off- whether this trip would be my last or not.
"Ahhh, hello, old friend."
Inside, Diana, the pretty bartender, gave me a smile as I squatted on a barstool.
"Hi there, ummm..."
"Oscar."
"Right! Oscar. You haven't been here in so long I forgot your name!"
"That kinda hurts my feelings, Diana."
"I'm sorry! Let me make it up to you. What'll you have?"
"Let me start with a Woodford Reserve rocks, splash of water. In a tall glass, if you don't mind."
"Will do. Are you going to be with us a while tonight?"
"That's my plan, yeah. I'm giving myself a sendoff."
"A sendoff? What for?"
"I'm taking a trip down to Mexico, and there is a possibility that I'm not going to make it home."
"Really? Oh my God."
So I told her the whole story, in that halting way you have to when you're having one of those constantly-interrupted conversations with a bartender as she's working.
"I can't believe that happened to Amber! She and her friend Kim were in here, I don't know, like three weeks ago. They were laughing and having a good time. Amber was trying to play wingman for Kim, but it wasn't working. All the guys were just hitting on Amber."
"That sounds about right."
Just them my phone buzzed; I had a message from Rachel.
"Where R U?" it said.
"@ The Wanderer," I replied.
"K."
"Booty call?" That was Diana.
"I'll have you know that I'm a very faithful guy. But my guess is this is a friend of mine who's going to try to talk me out of going."
"When are you leaving?"
"Monday. I'm driving down to San Antonio and staying there, then Tuesday I head down to see this guy El Tiburon and hopefully get Amber back, then it's back to San Antonio Tuesday night and home Wednesday afternoon."
"How come you aren't flying?"
"Because you never know who picks you up at the airport. Plus, getting Amber on a plane could be weird."
"Why so?"
"Because she's a Factory Girl, Diana."
She gave me a shocked look, and it occurred to me that Diana had no idea Amber wasn't a real girl.
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