The Doll Forum

This is... uh... the first time I had to learn about this.

I am speechless.

Ish, you're with God now.

I don't know what else to say.

So, instead of saying much, I looked for an appropriate song to dedicate to Ish.

I was good friends with Lisa Whelchel. You may remember her better as Blair from the "Facts of Life". She sang this song. And gave me her album when it came out.

So, I'm going to dedicate this song to Ish.

You're still moving hearts to this day. May God bless and keep you, Ish.

http://www.moonport.org/He_Sings_Me_To_Sleep.mp3

I am sorry to say I did not get to know Ishtaria but I can tell from the post of the people that did she was special and will be missed.

May you journey home be special Ishtaria.

Coral

It's been a long, long time since I've been here, and when I saw this I couldn't believe my eyes.

I hope wherever you are you're happy and at peace Ish.

Glory wrote:It's been a long, long time since I've been here, and when I saw this I couldn't believe my eyes.

I hope wherever you are you're happy and at peace Ish.

Great post, I think of Ish everytime I log onto the forum. I was reading some old threads the other day, from I think 2003, and found a funny one started by Queenie. Ish was so happy to try out her new banning module on the hapless victim. See you on the other side, my friend.

A most touching memorial. So sad and a tragic loss. The words "if only" spring to my mind.
For those of us who have come after we are most grateful for her life, her efforts and her dedication.
Even though I never knew her I will never log in again without thinking about her based on the expressions & thoughts of this memorial.
muzza

Thanks Muzza for adding your thoughts to Ish's memorial thread.

Muzza wrote

A most touching memorial. So sad and a tragic loss. The words "if only" spring to my mind.
For those of us who have come after we are most grateful for her life, her efforts and her dedication.
Even though I never knew her I will never log in again without thinking about her based on the expressions & thoughts of this memorial.
muzza

The "if only" thing almost happened.
I got a pm, with a link to a zip archive with inside the root keys (passwords) of the servers, TDF ran on two servers running FreeBSD at that day, (now we run on one, running CentOS Linux).
I imediately understood that something was wrong with Ishtaria else she should not have posted that PM to me, server admins do never post root keys.
I warned Bill by PM that something was wrong (the if only thing could have happened here)
Bill told me that she was on holliday, but instead she suicided.


Mytime & Helen

Hi all,

Time to remember, 3 years ago the news came to us that Istaria, our former server admin, who made TDF as it is today, passed due to suicide.
She could not stand the fight needed to live any more.
I lit a little candle to remember her.


Ishtaria I hope you rest in peace.

Mytime & Helen

MT...

Ishtaria passed shortly before I joined TDF, but I remember her being discussed at the time. What happened to her was truly tragic.

I have had several friends that committed suicide over the years and in each case we were all left with emotions ranging from profound grief to anger. Mostly, we were angry with oursleves for not being able to prevent the person from taking his or her life and angry at a world that would force people to occasioanlly take such extreme measures to end their pain. Sadly, in practically every case they were people who were very talented, but the victims of more than their share of bad luck.

Hopefully, in the future we will have an economic / health system in place that will be able to help people before they get to the point of ending it all.


Ishtaria, wherever you are, may you find the serenity and security that was unfairly denied to you here on Earth....


technoguy

I've never been too skilled at saying goodbye....



I guess I'm still not.........



I'll get a White Rose, and let the Petals slip thru my fingers, in a Warm Summer breeze....bye Ish

Ish, for a long time after your death I thought of you as my angel. Whenever I was sad I thought of you, whenever something good happened to me I shared it with you. I do not know if we will ever meet in the next life but I am sure I will never forget you. Thanks for being my friend.

Rainy

I should have written this seventeen years ago...

I read TDF every single day throughout 2003-2007 or so. Things happened the way they do in the lives of old men like me, and today I was thinking fondly on my many interactions with Ishtaria. I always referred to her that way, not as "Ish".

After her death I scoured the internet looking for information about her. I found so many things that I did not expect. There was a great depth to Ishtaria. She earned my respect as a forum member, and my awe after I researched her life. I lost all the links years ago, so all I have now is an old man's memory of a delightful young woman with a very painful past. Yes, I know she was transgender, but she was always a woman to me and that is how I will always remember her.

Even now, I miss her. She was quite possibly the most open, compassionate, and sincere person I have ever met. My life has been long enough and widely traveled enough for that to have real meaning, not just words spoken without thought.