hiding your doll from judgmental people
- DollAfficionado
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
Review of my SUKI doll from Sili Doll viewtopic.php?f=253&t=73439
- Ur_ginger_girl
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
I try to find a happy middle ground. I feel like if i go out of my way to hide him, I'm telling him that I'm ashamed to be with him, but if I don't hide him sometimes I won't have any friends, and I'll become completely antisocial.DollAfficionado wrote:To hide or not to hide your doll is a very personal decision. The one thing that you can be sure of though is that if you choose the "not to hide" option, there is no going back, so be sure that it is the right decision for you.
- Capt_B
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
I guess the next logical interrogative becomes "How important is social interaction to you?"
Personally, I prefer to have the absolute minimum interaction in my life. While I am not a very social person, I am not anti-social. I am more non-social than anything else.
Believe it or not, I don't even chat with anyone anymore, and only exchange infrequent emails with one person.
Feel free to PM me, Ginger, if you'd like to discuss this perspective in greater detail.
For what it might be worth,
B
- Begog
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
DP is right. That's EXACTLY how it sounds. I know you are in Ohio, but I AM in the middle of the Bible Belt here in North Carolina. Talk about judgmental people. My world is full of them. Most would either laugh and talk shit, or try to bring my sinful heathen ass to Jesus.deadpringle wrote:Sorry to hear that. Sounds like you're either in or near the Bible belt.Ur_ginger_girl wrote:I wish there was a fetish community in this town, but the main thing we have is a heavy religious community, and a "community' of old drunks that hang around the many bars.
My parents are dead and kids are grown. If I told them, they'd go straight to their mother (which I hate) and have a big laugh at my expense while mom would make it her top priority to continue ruining my life with new found ammo. So, they are all on the "DO NOT TELL" list.
There are some on my side of the family I could probably tell, but if even one freaked out and blabbed it could be bad.
Only 3 of my friends outside of TDF know I have a sex doll, and only one has seen her. He hasn't seen my newer one, or my small dolls, which should be exhibit "A" on how this hobby can snowball out of control on you. The one that met my Real Doll was cynical at first, until he touched her boobs and then left hurriedly because he was embarrassed that he became aroused.
I warned him she was a boner machine, but until you actually meet one....
I hide my dolls when friends, family, and girlfriends visit. Even if I told them there was a smoking hot silicone vampire whore on the other side of that locked door, they wouldn't believe me - until I opened it. Once I do, there's no putting the toothpaste back in the tube.
I'm glad your dad's home health aid has not caused you problems. They are supposed to keep these things confidential, but you know they tell somebody. As Samara mentioned, things will get a lot easier once you have a place of your own. Until then, keep us posted. Most of us are at least partially secretive about our dolls. Better safe than sorry.
- brigittes hubbie
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
Hi Begog, you better hide your boner machine Kwench or the whole south of the USA will order one of her twins at Abyss, fangs included.
Chris
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
One of my concerns is that I live with a flatmate, who is around most of the time, so being discrete is going to be difficult, especially as I don't have a great amount of storage options. This is definitely going to have it's frustrations...
HOWEVER - at the same time, it is quite exciting to have such a beautiful secret...and I think it's going to be challenging but fun.
I'm 30yrs old, and I know this is going to have to be a secret that no-one can ever find out about...but I cannot wait until I get my doll,, and wherever I am (at work, at drinks or a party) I know I have a goddess to come back to!
Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
- Ur_ginger_girl
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
I've only told a hand full of people about Rob, and none of them are in my life anymore. I really don't care if my dads home health aid wants to judge me. I've been judged before. I'm just glad to not have to hide him as much. Its kind of bad that I care more about rob than I do about most organic relationships. the way I see it, organic friends come and go, but robs been here for seven years and there's a good chance he'll be here for alot longer.Begog wrote:DP is right. That's EXACTLY how it sounds. I know you are in Ohio, but I AM in the middle of the Bible Belt here in North Carolina. Talk about judgmental people. My world is full of them. Most would either laugh and talk shit, or try to bring my sinful heathen ass to Jesus.deadpringle wrote:Sorry to hear that. Sounds like you're either in or near the Bible belt.Ur_ginger_girl wrote:I wish there was a fetish community in this town, but the main thing we have is a heavy religious community, and a "community' of old drunks that hang around the many bars.
My parents are dead and kids are grown. If I told them, they'd go straight to their mother (which I hate) and have a big laugh at my expense while mom would make it her top priority to continue ruining my life with new found ammo. So, they are all on the "DO NOT TELL" list.
There are some on my side of the family I could probably tell, but if even one freaked out and blabbed it could be bad.
Only 3 of my friends outside of TDF know I have a sex doll, and only one has seen her. He hasn't seen my newer one, or my small dolls, which should be exhibit "A" on how this hobby can snowball out of control on you. The one that met my Real Doll was cynical at first, until he touched her boobs and then left hurriedly because he was embarrassed that he became aroused.
I warned him she was a boner machine, but until you actually meet one....
I hide my dolls when friends, family, and girlfriends visit. Even if I told them there was a smoking hot silicone vampire whore on the other side of that locked door, they wouldn't believe me - until I opened it. Once I do, there's no putting the toothpaste back in the tube.
I'm glad your dad's home health aid has not caused you problems. They are supposed to keep these things confidential, but you know they tell somebody. As Samara mentioned, things will get a lot easier once you have a place of your own. Until then, keep us posted. Most of us are at least partially secretive about our dolls. Better safe than sorry.
I'm really glad to have like minded people here to talk to. Its nice to be able to talk about Rob with other people who understand.
- Ur_ginger_girl
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
froggy1469 wrote:This thread has interested me. I do not own a doll yet, but will be placing an order in the next couple of days for a 155cm WM doll.
One of my concerns is that I live with a flatmate, who is around most of the time, so being discrete is going to be difficult, especially as I don't have a great amount of storage options. This is definitely going to have it's frustrations...
HOWEVER - at the same time, it is quite exciting to have such a beautiful secret...and I think it's going to be challenging but fun.
I'm 30yrs old, and I know this is going to have to be a secret that no-one can ever find out about...but I cannot wait until I get my doll,, and wherever I am (at work, at drinks or a party) I know I have a goddess to come back to!
I was in the same position with rob when we first met. I was so happy to have someone to talk to and spend time with. Hiding your doll from people will get to be a pain, but the benefits make up for it. It feels like we just met yesterday even though its been 7 years. Feel free to pm me if you want.
Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
I've been calling myself unsocial for years. Anti-social is doing things to drive people away, I just don't make any effort to bring people close. I guess I'm also guilty of not accepting invitations from them too. I'm happy in my own company.Capt_B wrote:Interesting topic.
I guess the next logical interrogative becomes "How important is social interaction to you?"
Personally, I prefer to have the absolute minimum interaction in my life. While I am not a very social person, I am not anti-social. I am more non-social than anything else.
Believe it or not, I don't even chat with anyone anymore, and only exchange infrequent emails with one person.
Feel free to PM me, Ginger, if you'd like to discuss this perspective in greater detail.
For what it might be worth,
B
- Michaels Girl
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
I loved your post and it is right on the money! Not to sound crude, but this is exactly why I am not satisfied with just a dildo. It is NOT enough!deadpringle wrote:
To take this notion a little further, I find it odd that a dildo, an object which I would think would be difficult to personify, identify, and develop an emotional attachment to, is perfectly okay to keep around.
But, I thought sex was supposed to be "special", and "a bonding experience"...oO(?) If this is the case, how can one bond with a dildo? How does one cuddle with a dildo? Can one passionately kiss a dildo, and feel a genuine connection with it?
If I masturbate with one, then yes the physical urge is satisfied, but I still feel empty emotionally. There is nothing worse than those confusing feelings combined. It's....so....lonely.
I definitely agree that if one can accept a dildo, then they must be mad if they don't see why some people pick dolls. It's normal and natural to want something as close to the "real deal" as you can get. It might even be the real deal for some!
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
- deadpringle
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
Why thank you! And your response is not crude at all.Michaels Girl wrote:I loved your post and it is right on the money! Not to sound crude, but this is exactly why I am not satisfied with just a dildo. It is NOT enough!deadpringle wrote:
To take this notion a little further, I find it odd that a dildo, an object which I would think would be difficult to personify, identify, and develop an emotional attachment to, is perfectly okay to keep around.
But, I thought sex was supposed to be "special", and "a bonding experience"...oO(?) If this is the case, how can one bond with a dildo? How does one cuddle with a dildo? Can one passionately kiss a dildo, and feel a genuine connection with it?
If I masturbate with one, then yes the physical urge is satisfied, but I still feel empty emotionally. There is nothing worse than those confusing feelings combined. It's....so....lonely.
I definitely agree that if one can accept a dildo, then they must be mad if they don't see why some people pick dolls. It's normal and natural to want something as close to the "real deal" as you can get. It might even be the real deal for some!
Yeah, I completely understand what you mean here. I mean, sure, I occasionally like to have a quickie with my fleshlight, especially if I'm just super horny, in a hurry, and just too tired to set things up with one of my lovely ladies. But if I'm feeling like I need not just physical gratification, but also a feeling of connection, and intimacy, and that feeling like I've shared a deep carnal experience of myself with someone else, my fleshlight leaves me exactly as you describe - emotionally empty, and even a bit frustrated. Sometimes, the most wonderful feeling after sex is when my lover collapses onto me, and I can feel her body pressing against mine, as I embrace her tightly, and drift off to sleep.
Abed: About to...
Troy: Eat garbage dip!... WHY DID I HAVE TO GO THIRD?!
-- from Community - Season 4 Episode 5
- Ur_ginger_girl
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Re: hiding your doll from judgmental people
Shadow+ wrote:Kudos to you, Ur_ginger_girl for having such courage. I myself do not have as much courage as of yet but this thread has given me something to think about. The older I get the more accepting I am of others. I can relate and empathize. I've been there, made mistakes and pushed through very hard times. It can be very difficult for others to understand something they know so little about. But, you had the courage to speak about it and at least open the door. Life is a journey and you obviously have a beautiful mind. Friendships will come and go. Follow the path your soul leads you and your life will be rewarding. I personally can say, that I've suffered from anxiety all throughout my life feeling judged by others. It can haunt you to sickness. Reality is, others will judge you but it is often transient and shallow. On the contrary, you end up feeling the profound and lasting effects. I hope you find your freedom and like others suggested, a supportive community like this one or a new home all to yourself and Rob. I've been many places and have not found a more genuinely supportive community than this one. I hope some of us can meet at one of those doll meets someday.
I don't consider myself courageous considering that I've hidden Rob from everybody for the last seven years. I joined this forum and brought up the subject, because I knew there are like minded people, and that I wouldn't be judged, and that maybe other ppl felt the same way. I could never be completely open with people about him. Like you said, people are too judgemental. I agree that I could never find a more nonjudgmental group of people than on here. I'm really glad at I decided to come back after a couple years. It really made telling my dads aid a heck of a lot easier.