First things first; I'm a 38yo male, married for 6 years, living in the Netherlands, and I work in IT as systems administrator.
Not long after I figured out that 'handling' certain body parts could have a pleasant effect (thinking back I guess I was around 14 or so?) I started experimenting with things to improve the feeling. Making a stroker using a sandwich bag, sponges and rubber band, those kinds of things. A few years later, after we moved to a house where I had a lot more storage space, I built my own fabric torso. Towels, t-shirts, other bits of fabric, they all got re-purposed into a crude torso. I didn't develop feelings for it, never gave it a name, but I did spend a LOT of time holding and cuddling it. Not that I didn't use it for sex, but I enjoyed sleeping while holding something in my arms enormously. I was still living with my parents, so I took it from the storage space every night, and put it back every morning.
Eventually, I moved out. I now had an entire house (well, a modest one anyway) for myself. I bought a projector and screen, a PlayStation, got cats, and most importantly in this context, I upgraded the torso. It got a skeleton made from PVC pipe, complete with arms and legs, which of course got layers of fabric over them. Nylons/stockings are great at keeping things together, and they don't feel too bad. I never did manage to fabricate soft breasts, and a head proved to be beyond my abilities. Or maybe I didn't try hard enough; wrapping arms around me was great, but I didn't really miss the lack of a head. The PVC skeleton broke frequently, mostly the shoulder pivots, sometimes a part of the hip. This was annoying, but a fairly easy fix. She (still no name, but 'she' instead of 'it') occupied my bed until the next stage in my life. No parents, no roommates, so she only got to see the inside of a closet when I was expecting company.
During all of this I was interested in girls/women, but they weren't interested in me. Or at least, I thought they weren't. I have it on good authority that I just don't see the hints, and that there are actually a fair number of women who appear to show interest in me, but of course people only tell me AFTER... Eventually I started online dating. After some botched attempts (not all of them, but some definitely botched by me
) I found my wife. We chatted and Skyped for a bit under a month, decided to meet, and the day we met in person is the day we regard as the first day of our relationship. Whelp. A woman. In my life. Frequently coming over, staying at my place for days at a time... What do I do with the doll? Well, I didn't need the doll anymore, I had the real deal to hold and cuddle. So I told my girlfriend (now wife) about it (we don't have secrets) and we disposed of the doll. That was almost 8 years ago, and I'm still married, and I still love my wife. So, why does the topic title say I'm a new Teddy Babe owner?!?
It's not a dead bedroom (there is some action; perhaps not as much as I would like but certainly not dead either), but the same principles from my very first torso still applies: I like to hold something, someone. Hold it, cherish it, caress it... My wife doesn't. She has a disability, which (among other things) make holding her for a prolonged period (read: anything over a few minutes) hurt, and a caress is more likely to give her a cold shiver than to be enjoyed. There has always been a bit of a disconnect between what I want, and what she wants. I often abstain because she doesn't like it much, she sometimes gives in because she knows I do. It works, kind of, but I was looking for something to cuddle. A few years ago we bought a plush shark from Ikea (BLÅHAJ) who we nicknamed "shark" (how imaginative
), but, while fairly adequate in the 'holding something' department, it's a poor substitute for a human.The last six months have been a bit of a dry spell, so somehow I got back to the topic of dolls. I've known about RealDoll for years, but they were WAY too expensive when I was younger, and they're still a lot more expensive than I'm willing to spend, even if I were single. But, nowadays we have TPE, and a lot more vendors. I think it was a cheap doll on AliExpress ($600 range) that brought my attention back, and after thinking: "Wow, that's cheap!" I started reading up. To own a TPE doll, such a life like progression of the bundle of towels I used to cuddle, surely, that would be the ultimate experience, right? I've spent quite some time drooling over the naughty and nice WM 166C's, looking up sizes, experiences, maintenance and care... Teddy babes did come up (fairly frequently, even), but I dismissed those. US vendor, prohibitive shipping costs, customs, VAT, comical heads / eyes... Why would you go for that when you can buy something as life-like as a TPE doll?
However, slowly the realization set in that TPE dolls are heavy, high maintenance and fragile. Oh, and expensive, the $ 600 on Ali is most likely a low quality fake; be prepared to shell out a few thousand. But wait, there was something about those Teddy Babes... "Cuddle queen"? Low weight? Hardly any maintenance? And there is a UK vendor (so low shipping costs and no VAT or customs due to Schengen)? Long story short, reading up on Teddy Babes, they grew on me.
But, there's still the missus. I'm still married, and I don't plan on changing that any time soon. How would she react? We don't have any secrets, and having to hide the doll defeats the purpose of falling asleep while cuddling, as we rarely spend the night apart. So I broached the subject of our disconnect, of my needs versus her needs, of the lack of physical affection. Of course, physical intimacy is a part of that, but to mitigate that (to an extent) I don't really need a doll, a fleshlight will do that without inducing jealousy. My main purpose of a Teddy Babe was, and is, to cuddle.
My wife was receptive of my 'plight', and even referred back to the doll we disposed of 8 years ago "but if you want something like that, get something prefab, don't build it yourself". We didn't really finish the conversation, or at least, I couldn't really steer it towards a new prospective doll (even though the subject of 'dolls' had come up). It took a few attempts to actually have the conversation, but eventually we talked about my proposed solution. She agreed almost immediately: "It's your money"... I did press on, if she was sure, but she approved. Well, LoveHoney had a sale (combined 37% off of the regular £800) so I ordered myself a "Lisa". Lovehoney doesn't have much choice, I might have gone for a Daphne otherwise, but a Lisa is fine. Most notable difference is bust size, as I would have requested a shorter wig for Daphne anyway. The main reason to go for Lovehoney is price; having Eight Wonder ship a TBD to Europe would be roughly twice as expensive. As for the name of the doll, my original plan was to call "Lisa" "Keira" (*points at username*) but that's a bit of a weird sound to produce when you speak Dutch all day, so we settled on "Scarlet".
In hindsight it may have been better if my wife and I had discussed it a bit more, because I can tell she isn't 100% comfortable with Scarlett. For me, my wife is the woman in my life, and Scarlett is 'just' an upgraded version of Shark, but my wife clearly sees this a bit differently. She's not really opposed to me holding Scarlett, but she does comment on it, asks me if I'll go Shark, Scarlett or solo that night, or refer to her as "doll" ("pop"). I'm really trying make it so Scarlett is a not big deal, so it's not special if I hug her instead of Shark, but my wife is still getting used to the idea. I'm treading lightly, and we'll see how things evolve.
For everyone still readying, thank you
It's not something I get to talk about often, and I'm not sure I'd call writing this post therapeutic, but it did become quite a long post. It was even longer at first 
and reading back I feel like I'm rushing through things, but it's long enough as it is. I can always expand on things if the need arises 
I have bobby pins, hair clips and hair bands so Scarletts eyes are clear and I'm not choking on a tangle when spooning. People (read, threads on forums 
)
