To me, that doesn't neccesarily sound like a bad doll - It could just as well have been an uninformed/neglectful owner. Keep in mind, he's already been using the doll for three months. Alot can happen in that time.
it was bought for photo use and had only a brief bit of 'intimate' uses on the day
He mainly used it as a photography mannequin, which means the doll was always being posed, even more so for changing outfits.
The TPE has given way and split on the wrists leaving the hands dangling
Until recently, dolls wrists were not made to support any weight. Improper posing could have caused this, easily. (... or his 'brief intimate uses' - a rough doggie-style session could also have caused this.)
the body has become stained with the clothing i used for photos.
This happens to every TPE doll.
the wires in the fingers have all poked trough
This is also common among dolls.
Even the eye lashes have fallen off!
Seriously...?!?
the head has sheared off the neck connection
Considering his overall lack of knowledge concerning TPE dolls, it's likely that this may also have been caused by rough/neglectful handling.
i have owned this for about 3 months and do not have the skill or patience to try and fix it.
It's possible that he also didn't have the skills or patience to maintain, and care for his doll. He may have treated it as if it were just a typical mannequin, and caused all of the damage himself.
I agree that going with an approved vendor is the smartest thing to do. When my first delivery arrived with a broken neck, my vendor took care of me. When my second delivery arrived, it was the wrong model, and again, my vendor took care of me. Even after the sale, he has continued to give me support.
I think that no matter who you order from, there is a chance that something will go wrong. Using an approved vendor is your insurance against the bad things that can, and do happen.
However... No vendor can protect a doll from a neglectful owner.